two years, nine months, two weeks

Dear Zachary,

Sometime when I overhear you reprimanding your toys, I think, I'm not doing this parenting thing so well. You will be yelling at Elmo, telling him to get back in bed, that it's not time to talk.

And other times, I overhear you approach Elmo with gentleness. You wrap him in your favorite giraffe blanket and hold him in your arms, saying "sh, Elmo, it's ok. I'm here, I'm here. I'm right here with you Elmo. I'm not going anywhere. I love you, Elmo."

And I know we're all going to be ok.

I love you, my sweet boy,

Mommy.

two years, nine months

Happy three-quarter birthday!

I can feel your third birthday approaching. So many things that used to be so difficult about parenting you are getting easier. The "terrible two's" have certainly had their terrible moments, and I have certainly have had my terrible moments, too. 

What I'm most happy about is that you are starting to listen more and more to what mommy and daddy are telling you. You rarely fight to get in your stroller when you need to be in your stroller (running late, crowded areas, too far for you to walk), you don't hesitate often to take my hand when crossing the street, and, finally, I'm not afraid that you will run into the street because you "want to." 

You are starting to walk and not run everywhere you go - especially on the sidewalk and around the pool. I love being able to walk with you and talk about your life. I couldn't do that when I spent most of our time together chasing you. 

Until next week,

Mommy. 

two years, eight months, four weeks

Dearest Zachary,

Mommy and Daddy are really trying to model for you appropriate ways to stand up for yourself so that when you are big, you will know how to stand up for yourself and for others. We want you to know which battles to pick, and which to just let go. We want you to feel strong and use your words so that you can explain yourself and what you need and want. We want you to know how to listen to what others need and what they want and come to a compromise. We want you to feel good about yourself and your capabilities and support others as they discover and develop theirs.  These are also the reasons why we picked your school last Spring. We knew the Montessori model would help foster your independence, your problem-solving skills and your sense of community responsibility. We thought the combination of routine and structure in a child-centered atmosphere was what you would thrive in best. And we were right.  

This week mommy and daddy are struggling with a very difficult decision: whether or not to try to move you to a different classroom in the Fall. You were placed in the Red room with one of your friends from last year, but not the other two. The red room teachers, in my opinion, are under qualified, and, considering how much money we are paying for you to be in school 8.5 hrs a day, we are fairly disappointed that your school would hire this person to teach you - or any other child. When I think to myself about this, I wonder if I'm being too picky, if I'm being the parent that constantly says "you're not good enough for my child". As a teacher, I really dispose these parents. They create issues where there are none, they are overly dramatic when there is no need.  I don't think I'm creating an issue here. We pay too much money to have someone teach you all day that A. doesn't have a degree, and B. does not seem to relate well to small children. And I don't think I'm being dramatic. Well, not yet at least.  While I know you will be just fine in any classroom, I am not comfortable putting you in a room with this particular "teacher" all day every day. And while I would love for you to be in a smaller classroom, as the Red room seems to be, I much prefer you being with your friends.

I love you too much to let you see mommy and daddy settle for anything short of what's best for you. It's all going to be ok. 

I love you,

Mommy

Stuttering

When you are totally exhausted, you develop a stutter. Sometimes the stutter is so heavy that you mix up consonants in words. Tonight's stutter consonant mix up was by far my favorite thus far. 

While talking about the toys you would get to see and play with during our upcoming trip to the pediatrician's office, you said, 

"And I c-c-c-can to s-s-s-s-sit on the big tr-tr-tr-trire fuck!"

Oh, how I love listening to you (try to) speak. 

two years, eight months, three weeks

Dear Zachary,

Tonight was the 5th night in a row that we put you in your big boy bed for the night and, for the most part, you stayed in your bed until you finally fell asleep. I am so proud of you. I know we've changed your sleeping arrangements a lot over the past month between taking off the side of the crib, to going on vacation and having you sleep on an air- mattress in two different houses over the course of 10 days. And although I've done my share of complaining and experienced my own anxieties about you being done with the crib, it looks as if, at this exact moment, that you are settling into this new routine. Finally.

Sleep tight, my little man. I know you'll be running into my room at some point in the middle of the night, asking to "sleep in mommy daddy's bed". And mommy and/or daddy will have to walk you back to your big boy bed...

I love you, even though you completely exhaust me most days.

Love,
Mommy.

two years, eight months, two weeks

Dear Zachary,

Before I start this week's letter, I just want to acknowledge that Mommy seems to be having a hard time writing you these letters weekly recently. For that much, I'm sorry. You see, we've been very busy spending our days together, and I'd rather spend my time playing with you (despite your resistance to take naps) than writing my blog. 

I wanted to document for you some of the random things you've been saying lately. Maybe next week (or hopefully later this week), I'll write more about our recent vacation and your first trip to Sea World. But for now, here are some quotes and bit of conversations from the past few weeks which have brought me smiles and laughter. 

1. "Old McDonald had a farm E I E I O. And on that farm he had a dog...B I N G O!"

2. You: bye bye mommy, I'm going now!

Me: where are you going?

You: I'm going to Sesame Street. I see you later!

3. While sitting  on the airplane to CA, you: we're going on an airplane next week!

Me: no Zac, we're on an airplane right now. 

4. While listening to a youth jazz ensemble in Santa Monica "when my big, I will do that, mommy!"

5. Upon arriving at grandma's house in San Diego, "where are the camels?" (We've been talking about the San Diego zoo a lot...

6. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,15,17,18,19,18...(me: 20), 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27,28,29,30,31,32,33,34,35,36,37,38,39...30-10!

7. Me: Zac, we're on the freeway. You: where's the four-way?? Me: no Zac, it's not a THREE-way...

8. At 5:30am, you: "what should I do now?" Me: "put your head down and go back to sleep."

9. After throwing hard objects at my face, "Mommy, I want you to be angry!"

10. "I'm not taking a nap, I'm taking a bedtime!"

11. "The weasels on the bus go round and round"

12. "I want to listen to possible music"

13. "You made him a steak in the elevator"

14. "These keys are for shalom bayit, but I don't need to use them because somebody's already here."

And the most shocking and least favorite, 

15. "You need to buy me a little iPad."

Looking forward to hearing what will come out of your mouth next!

Love, mommy. 

"What my hair?"

It's a lot of fun to listen to you talk, especially when I have no idea what you're saying (which is really only a small percentage of the time). For the most part, your speech is pretty clear and people who don't speak 2 year old can understand you fairly easily. Other times, it takes me a few tries to decipher your language. You are generally pretty patient with me and will repeat yourself several times until I get it. 

For a few months, you've been saying "bacanuum" to refer to the vacuum cleaner. "I help mommy with the bacanuum today!" 

Or, most recently, and maybe my favorite so far, "what my hair??" Which translates to "what do I hear?" Or "what's that unfamiliar sound?" I have to admit, while you say this phrase quite often, I still ask you "what's wrong with your hair?!" and have to take a moment to remember you are not talking about your head. 

two years, seven months, three weeks

Dear Zachary,

Sorry for the delay. It's been pretty busy around here since the school year ended. We are into week three in your toddler bed and I. Really missing your crib. Mommy and daddy (usually daddy) has to sit with you every night until you fall asleep. Some nights, it takes 15-20 mins, other night's, it's up to an hour before you are snoozing. 

What I wanted to write to you about this week is your rapidly developing sense of humor. Sometimes the things you say totally throw us off guard and we all end up laughing hysterically. For example, this past weekend I introduced you to Mr. Potato head. We were on Skype with Bobé and grandpa and you were showing them your new toy. You said "it's not mr. Potato head! It's misterrrrrrr....banana head!" I have no idea where you came up with that, but it made us all laugh. You didnt stop there. Mr. Veggie burger head, mr. Potato kugel head, mr. Sofa head, were more of the names you came up with, among others. 

It's so much fun to watch you play and to see your creativity and fantasy develop. 

Lots of love to you, my funny man.

Love, 

Mommy

two years, seven months, 10 days

Sweetest Zachary,

I'm so sorry I'm delayed on my letters recently. It's been very busy around here. Friday was your last day of school, but Mommy still has another week to go. Next week you'll be at Tata's work for summer camp at the nursery school there. I hope you have a great time. Here are a couple of pictures of you and your teachers this year. Mommy and Daddy are so grateful for them - they have been so patient and loving. I know you will miss them so much when you begin to understand that they will not be your teachers anymore. I wish you could stay with them, but in the Fall, you will be in an Early Childhood room where you will be for 2 years until you're ready for Kindergarten. Wow. Kindergarten is just 2 short years away...

 

Love you so much, my big boy!

Love, mommy

two years, seven months

Dear Zac,

As I sit here writing this letter to you, a day late, but on the day you turn 2 years and 7 months, you are having a hard time falling asleep. Again.

Now that potty training is pretty much done (no accidents in well over a week and pooping regularly in the potty both at home and at school), we are getting ready to transition you to a big boy bed. I keep thinking, tho, that even though you are past 2 and a half, you are potty trained, you can do most things independently, you are just not ready to be out of the crib. And I don't think this is a case of mommy isn't ready for her baby to grow up. I'm actually thinking, my big boy is just not ready to sleep in a bed without sides. Guard rails, bumpers, whatever, won't do it. You need to be in a crib.

Why do I think this? Where is this gut feeling coming from? I'll tell you.

Mommy and Daddy did such an excellent job training you to sleep in your crib that you can't sleep anywhere else. Except the car. And only if it's at least an hour or two past your nap time. (But considering all the struggles lately with bed time, it's no like your crib is actually that much easier lately.)  You seem to really only resist bedtime when I'm home alone with you which is beyond frustrating (like tonight). At least on nights like these, if you throw an "I don't want to go to sleep!" tantrum, I can at least keep you in your bed.

So, I don't really know what to do about your sleeping arrangements, though I do know when we get to California for our summer vacation, there will be no crib there...

I love you, my little active man. Sweet dreams,

Mommy